A Priceless Escape!

Escaping from lost dreams, vanishing wishes and hurtful memories, I hid myself in the most comfortable spot I could find in this house.

I am enjoying the warmth of my MacBook in a cold October night and thinking that the poor laptop deserves more care. Last week one of the pals in the Middle Eastern ensemble spilled a cup of hot sweet tea on BibiHuryeh. It functions but there are some casualties; the screen is damaged; there are some problems with saving files and receiving/replying emails. (Unhappy accident!)

This semester I am doing some work on Jean Dubuffet. I was trying to make sense of a couple of his letters (in French) when I came across a strange phrase. I was not quite sure what it meant. But I guessed it must be a satirical sentence; so I checked with my French teacher and I was right. Guessing of this kind is a considerable step in internalizing a new language. Everyday I feel more comfortable with my French. (Satisfying guess!)

Zeitoon is purring at my feet, his sweet face is calm, but his noble ears reacts excitedly to the sound of my fingers on the sticky keyboard. This is the calmest moment of my week. (Priceless!)

La Maison aux deux Chemins, Jean Dubuffet

Letters to Rilke - Number 1

Dear R ,

Did you really know it
or was it a poetic guess?

For me it has never been so clear.

And when it became as apparent as the truth should be,
then...

But before then,

Do you have any idea how apparent the truth should be?

Have you ever felt
its coldness,
its crispiness,
its sharpness,
when it falls on you like rain on an autumn night?


You must have had it right there!

It hit me in the eyes;
my eyes burned.

And I had always assumed it would hurt the heart the most,

But no,
One should never assume about the truth; for it is not assumable.

And I was wrong about the heart,
It is the eyes that the truth hunts!

Letters to Rilke is a new sequence I am working on these days. Each piece have a parallel component from Rilke's Elegies.

Rainer Maria Rilke,
Duino Elegies,
Fragments of the First Elegy:

" But sing, when you must,
of great lovers:
their fame
has a long way to go
before it is really immortal.
...

Think of it:
the hero survives.

Even his ruin
is only another excuse to continue
a final birth.

But nature, exhausted
takes lovers
back into herself
as if she couldn't accomplish
that kind of vitality twice."

Those moments ...

And it is on those moments of desperation that one needs
And it is on those moments of desperation that one needs
And it is on those moments of desperation that one needs
And it is on those moments of desperation that one needs

That one believes
That one stretches
That one bends
That I ...

The Fool for the Full !

The moon was full tonight or it felt like it.

I saw it when walking to the churchyard.
Such a satisfying sight; full and complete.

And as I walked, I remembered, it was still a couple of days to the full moon in October.

I am such a fool for the full that I am a fool in full!

The full moon tonight was no fool;
It was carefully round, and I enjoyed its carefulness!

The Sleeping Gypsy (detail), 1897, Henri Rousseau
I took the photo in 2008 in MOMA.*

*It was hard to be far from New York and this smiling mustached moon in one of my favorite paintings.